How do you experience anger? Is it all in your head? Racing thoughts? Occasional thoughts? Intrusive thoughts? Or is it elsewhere in your body? Does your breathing change? Do your muscles clench? Which ones? In your neck? Your chest? Your face? Do you find yourself clenching your fists? Jiggling your leg?
At whom are you angry? Yourself? Your family? Your friends? Those you love? Those you work with? Those you don’t even know?
What makes you angry? Your own actions? Those of others? Things you, or others, say? To you? About you? Or does it arise in circumstances that don’t have anything directly to do with you? Does the news make you angry? Do interactions with strangers make you angry? On the subway? Driving? Walking? Do external stimuli make you angry? Noise? Conversations? Odors?
What emotions accompany your anger? Envy? Jealousy? Fear? Insecurity? Is your anger fear in disguise? One of these other emotions? Something else? Is anger a safer, more controllable emotion for you than these other emotions? Or is it the other way around? Does your anger scare you?
Do you stew in your anger? Ruminate and cogitate? Replay past events in your head?
Do you run from your anger, seeking alternative sensations and feelings to avoid it?
Or do you seek opportunities to be angry? Engage in interactions you know are likely to lead to anger?
And what is your attitude toward your anger, toward yourself when you’re angry? Do you judge yourself? Your anger? Your ways of responding to your anger?
And when your anger subsides, what causes it to do so? Resolution of the underlying issue? Time, distance, perspective? Simply speaking your mind? Or do you channel your anger into action? Work? Sex? Physical activity? Exercise?
Does anger turn you on? Turn you off? Attract you? Repel you?
I’m interested in your anger. Let’s explore it together.